Travel

I’m in Las Vegas for a few days and what do you do when you go to Vegas? See Celine Dion, of course!

Just after 3 a.m. I was leaving a nightclub and was walking down to the strip to my hotel room when something caught my eye at the stoplight: a young guy in a cut-off sleeveless plaid shirt, jeans, cowboy boots, and a cowboy hat. He looked stunning like a model with deep brown wavy hair and dark brown eyes. Moreover, I also tried bandarq online which was an amazing experience for me as I really enjoy poker and other card games. 

The Las Vegas strip is a round-the-clock affair central so there are mobs of people out there at any given time.

The night had grown much cooler after 3 a.m. and I stopped and asked the stunning Ashton Kutcher look-alike, “Are you cold?”

Just as I said that my mind flashed to the movie Midnight Cowboy where Jon Voight is in a cowboy hat and basically homeless and cold in Times Square and Dustin Hoffman befriends him.

I asked this guy where was he going and he said, “7-Eleven” and I said, “Oh good I am going there too.” I actually wasn’t going there, but when you run into a super hottie you try not to blow it.

So I bought the looker an energy drink with a malt beverage in it. Isn’t America great that you can buy an energy drink with booze in it? I was the one who probably needed an energy drink.

The hottie’s name is William and he was sort of like a lost puppy that follows you home. Sometimes the heavens part and drop something good in your lap.

The strapping 6-foot-4 William told me he was a welder. Of course, he was, and I made a joke: “Like Jennifer Beals in the film Flashdance?” This went right over his head. William is 26-years-old and I think he was conceived four years before Flashdance came out.

William asked me if the rooms were nice at my hotel. I responded, “Yeah actually they’re really nice.” Thank God I decided not to scrimp on this trip and did not choose a Motel 6. I’m staying at the hip and happening Planet Hollywood right on the strip.

Just as we were walking towards the entrance of the hotel I quickly said, “Do you want to come up?” God, I sounded like a cliched pro from some smutty movie only this was my smutty movie and I was the lead.

But I did something I usually don’t do – I quickly walked away from him towards the glass door of the hotel. I kept hoping he would just follow me and was tempted to look back to see if he was or decided to leave. But I was so disciplined that night that I didn’t look back to see if he was coming and just kept walking towards the elevators.

William was right behind me and there we were: silently standing inside the elevator. I think I made some small talk. I told William he should be a model. It was not just some crass line. It was true as he was even more attractive and stunning in the bright overhead elevator lights. He told me that a lot of people have told him the same thing. (What? Someone else is as insightful as me?) I asked him his nationality and William told me that he’s Italian, German, French, Scottish and American Indian. I feel as if I am now the ambassador to the United Nations.

As I used the card key to my hotel room there was no more small talk or idle chatter. Once inside, I told him to sit on my desk chair (which as you know in all hotels is right near the bed). He sat down and I changed the channels on the TV to see what would be good to watch. Who am I kidding? I was looking for a channel to leave on so we could use the TV as a backlight while we’re in bed.

I turned off a couple of lamps and I then as we were talking I slowly began moving some stuff I’d left on the bed. Once I was done, I stared at the TV screen. William asked me if I had a girlfriend. I told him, “I’m not straight.” He replied, “I figured so much.”

As we talked further I felt that William was slowly letting his guard down. As we were getting to know each other I made William smile and laugh a lot. (He doesn’t know I’m a comic). William had an amazing smile and laugh.

We’re talking and talking and talking. I was really tired, so I asked if I could give him a massage. He says no and says he’s straight. I asked him, “Why did you come up to my room then?” He told me he was cold.

I am now massaging his neck with my right hand. He tells me that I should do this professionally ’cause it feels so good.

As we talked further his charming adorableness became a bit creepy.

William said he was having trouble getting the right welding job since he had trouble with his birth certificate and his social security card. It’s now 6 a.m. and we are discussing his work prospects. I am now his guidance counselor.

Why could I have not picked up a cast member from one of the Cirque du Soleil’s shows, as surely they would have been full-on gay?

As William keeps talking I start to clear some more stuff off the bed to get ready for our “against God lovemaking.” And he starts to say stuff like, “I am so lost” and I say, “We’re all lost, don’t worry about it.” He then says, “Sometimes I don’t know who I am” and I reply, “It’s 6 a.m. I don’t even know who I am right now.” Then he starts to tell me that he’s on probation. What? Did I miss something? I feel as if I’m in a bad Cops episode.

So I told him that he had to go. He told me that he’s practically homeless and that he’s staying with two older gay guys at their house – sleeping in their living room on a reclining chair. I told him how lucky he was to be taken in by strangers and I closed the door and locked it.

When I woke up at noon, I noticed he had left his cowboy hat on the chair.